What else is there to live for? Stand at the window here. Was ever such a dreary, dismal, unprofitable world? See how the yellow fog swirls down the street and drifts across the dun-coloured houses. What could be more hopelessly prosaic and material? What is the use of having powers when one has no field upon which to exert them? Crime is commonplace, existence is commonplace, and no qualities save those which are commonplace have any function upon earth.
... fuck. It's... Sherlock. My ID number is [REDACTED], my squad name is, officially, the "Baker Street Regulars". I am, as ordered, reporting.
Due to faulty intelligence, our squad was deceived into thinking that 66342-O was some kind of mortal. That he was able to be killed. The lack of results, therefore falls solely onto me. I ask for the disciplinary hearing to take that into account. The fault was none other than my own Hubris. As such, I have been advised to... share absolutely everything that I know about David Banks, for, and I quote "Your own good, and your squad's. Unless, of course, Sherlock, you're as heartless as some of your reports paint you as~!". I have... chosen to take my Handler's, Writer's, advice.
David Banks and I have been in close contact for about three months. We initially met, at his bequest, within Location #45BnC, more commonly known as the Cafe Loop. From there, contact continued. Seemingly... somewhat... occasionally by what seemed to be chance, but what also may have been tracking on further inspection. I...
(I'm so sorry)
I was never told to cease contact with Mr. Banks, and the contact steadily became more regular and direct. More focused. There was an incident in which I was interrupted on... my way to a bridge. As such, we became what could be classified as "closer"?
... Under orders, I am to state exactly what the nature of this relationship is. The intention of this, so I'm told, is humiliation. As such; I have entered a close, intimate, emotional relationship with a direct superior. I am not of the same rank as him. I have "exploited" this position and intentionally kept it concealed from my squad and the public. I am aware of Mr. Banks' engagement. My actions have been described as those of a "concubine", and I am instructed to agree with this assessment. I am aware that my actions have been put on my record, and that I'm to await further instruction and punishment. I consent to whatever further action that can and/ or will take place.
I am also aware that Mr. Banks has the right to comment on this issue, but also am aware that he only has partial control over this situation. I have been advised to inform Mr. Banks that his input, however, will be taken into consideration. I consent to this information being recorded and filed in differing types of media. I consent t-to possible termination for my behaviour, though I h-hhave been informed such a decision is unlikely under the current circumstances. I cconsent to taking full responsibility for the failure of the assignment. I consent to demotion and-dd transfer.
... in other, happpier news, let's welcome an ollld friend of m-minee, The Janitor, t-to the Baker Squad. I do hoope the transfer wasn't too ttroublesome.
Aas such, I will continue my investigationn of the faulty intelligence. A-awaiting further orders.